Mabuhay at magandang hapon sa inyong lahat. I bring you the greetings of the officers and staff of the Women’s Crisis Center that runs the National Family Violence Prevention Program. I also congratulate the Foundation for Adolescent Development for honoring in more ways than one, young adults like you for teaching us a lot about young adults and sexuality.

I’d like to open my presentation by giving you a definition of gender issues. Gender issues are issues, concerns and problems arising from the different roles played by men and women in society. They are also issues, concerns and problems that arise from questioning the relationship between women and men. They are concerns that arise when an instance of gender inequality is recognized as undesirable or unjust.

What is Gender? I am sure that the first time you came across gender was in grammar school. And your teachers, what did your teachers tell you about gender? That gender is a property of nouns and pronoun that tell you whether it is masculine, feminine or neuter.

Gender as an ideology. Aside from functioning as a property of language, it also functions as an ideology. It functions as a means of social control and as a maintainer of social distance. This explains why, when we are asked to wash dishes for example, who do we usually expect to wash dishes at home? The girls, although sometimes boys are asked to do that. But because of gender ideology, girls are obligated to wash dishes. And if boys are obligated to wash dishes it’s really up to them. Pero ang mga babae ay obligadong maghugas ng pinggan. Bakit? We say, trabahong babae iyan. Kung minsan sinasabi natin ganoon iyan talaga. Panahon pa ng kalola-lolahan natin, ng kalolo-lolohan pa natin ganoon na talaga.

Gender as a means of social control. Gender also tells us how to behave as girls and boys or as women and men. May upong babae, may upong lalake, hindi ba? Why? Because gender functions as a means of social control.

Gender as a maintainer of social distance. It is evident in our jokes, iyong mga sexist jokes na tinatawag. Nakikita natin iyan sa mga stereotypes o sa mga de-kahon na pananaw sa mga babae at lalake. Nakikita natin yan sa mga prejudices na tinatawag o sa mga discriminations. At ngayon, problema sa buong mundo ang karahasan sa kababaihan.

Gender as a determinant of femininity and masculinity. Violence against women as a form of social distance is a result of gender relations. As an organizing principle in society, gender is also a determinant of femininity and masculinity. This is a defining principle of relationship between men and women. Kung papaano dumidiskarte ang mga babae at mga lalake sa isa’t-isa.

Gender as a determinant of social relationships. It functions as a determinant of power relations in society. It is a shaper of values and attitudes towards society. Perhaps it would be easier for me to define gender by comparing it with another concept or comparing it with another construct which will lead us to the topic which is “Gender Issues in Adolescent Sexuality”.

Sex vs. gender. I will define gender by distinguishing it with sex. Sex is oftentimes used as a shorthand for sexuality but it is not what we are talking about this time. Sex is determined by nature, kung ano ang ibinigay sa iyo ng Diyos. Iyan sa Ingles ay tinatawag na sex. I have to caution you that there is no word for gender in Filipino and in many Malaysian-Polynesian languages. Sinasabi ng iba na ang kasarian daw ang pinakamalapit na salita sa konsepto ng gender. Dahil sa wala tayong salita na eksaktong tumutugma sa konsepto ng gender, kinakailangan tingnan natin kung ano iyong mga katangian ng mga babae at lalake. Ang nagmumula sa nature o kalikasan o sabihin nating sa Diyos -- ang mga katangiang iyon ay sex. Samantalang ang mga katangian ng mga babae at lalake na nagmumula sa kultura o lipunan ay gender.

Ang mga katangiang sex ay kasama sa kapanganakan o bago pa tayo ipinanganak nanduon na ang sex characteristics. Samantalang ang mga gender characteristics ay natututunan, napag-aaralan. They are acquired after birth. One way of distinguishing between sex and gender is to say that sex is what you’re born with and gender is what happens to you afterwards.

Sex characteristics are present in either women or men while gender characteristics are present in both women and men. Thus, in the case of women, enlarged breasts are found in mature women but not in mature men. Gender characteristics are those found in both women and men. Strength and weakness, for example, are found in both women and men. Those are gender characteristics. Sex characteristics are relatively fixed, emphasis on relative. Because there are instances when sex can be altered. Generally, sex characteristics are fixed while gender characteristics are interchangeable, changeable and changing. Naipagpapalit, nagbabago at bumabago. Sex is categorized as either male or female while gender is categorized as feminine or masculine. Sex characteristics are equal in value while for gender, its attributes are marked by inequality.

In life, sex and gender are not divided along these columns. Because in fact, sex and gender interact with each other in a relationship which we are about to see. We have that relationship between nature and culture and therefore an inextricable link between sex and gender.

Gender issues in sexuality. As I said earlier, in common parlance we use sex as a shorthand for sexuality. But I’d like to offer a definition of sexuality, referring to it as human sexuality and therefore refer to it as one’s fullness as a human being. Human sexuality or any human activity is subject to the vagaries of biology and culture and so we look at gender or rather we look at human sexuality as a result of gender, both of which have come from culture.

Sexuality like gender is based on biological sex -- you’re referring to the genital organ or sex organ. But gender is socially or culturally constructed. What we have, what nature has given us is subject to culture. Biological females or males acquire sexual identity which correspond more or less to socially normative defined notions of female or male sexuality. It is here that it would be wise to remember the difference between sex and gender. Because then we would be able to see how culture shapes or determines what we do with our sexual identities.

What are the issues in gender and sexuality? First because of gender ideology we have developed a dualism, a split-- paghahati sa mga babae at lalake. We have masculing feelings and feminine feelings. Again these are stereotypes, that is why we say logic is masculine and feelings are feminine. In reality that is not so. Gender ideology has assigned logic to the male realm and feelings to the female realm. As a result of this we have this difficulty; men find it difficult for example to cope with the requirement that they become tunay na lalake. Becoming tunay na lalake oftentimes gets in the way of pagiging tunay na tao. Most males believe that they must achieve power control by making a female, whether young or adult, submit to them. Conversely, females following gender ideology submit to men.

Another gender issue is the limitation of emotional expression in boys or males. Boys are not allowed to cry. Parents say when boys are hurt-“Ano ka ba, parang hindi ka lalake!” Males are not allowed to feel or even to display emotion. As a result of this, they have limited skills for understanding or communicating feelings. Conversely, women act to a point of sometimes exploiting their feelings. Men tend to sexualize their emotional expression. This narrowing of emotional expression has been limited to sexual expression. Their emotional needs are conveyed through sexual contact. They have difficulty understanding the difference between nurturing, nurturance and sexualization.

Many men go to lengths to prove their masculinity through daredevil activities, sexual promiscuity, aggressive behavior and violence. In short, through machismo. Males are expected to be confident, knowledgeable, aggressive and therefore, not victims. This is a trap for men, because men can also be victims. But our culture maintains that males cannot be victims. Because to be a victim means one is an inadequate male. And therefore males have nowhere to go when they are victimized.

Other issues that relate to the ideology of male superiority aside from role stereotypes are gender role standards and sexual slurs. I have mentioned earlier discrimination and the double standard of morality.

For men, to be macho is to have as many children as one can without responsibility for them. On the other hand, women take the burden of responsibility of an act whether men and women are jointly involved. These are some of the gender issues I have brought up to challenge and to encourage you to join us in a move toward the development of maybe a new bill of rights, of sexual rights and responsibilities. I also submit that we should not be determined by circumstances; we should determine the circumstances around us.

So first, I would challenge you to accept your sexuality. The premise being that all human beings are sexual beings. Second, all sexual encounters should be subjected to a humane and humanistic value. Third, sexuality should be based on human behavior and needs. Fourth, sexual morality should come from a sense of caring and respect for others. Hindi iyong naka-isa o naka-score. Sexual morality should be viewed as an inseparable part of general morality. Sexual values and sex acts like other human values should be evaluated on whether they frustrate or enhance human fulfillment. Fifth, the boundaries of human sexuality should be expanded. We should not stop or end our sexuality, we should not allow ourselves to be defined mainly or only by genital sexuality.

Responsible sexuality should now be viewed as an expression of intimacy for women; for men, it is a source for enjoyment and enrichment in addition to a way of releasing sexual energy. And for us to develop equality between the sexes as an essential feature of a sensible sexual morality, I submit that all legal, occupational, economic and political discrimination against women should be removed and all traces of sexism erased. Until women have equal opportunities, they will be vulnerable to exploitation by men. In particular, men must recognize the rights of women to control their own bodies and determine the nature of their own sexual expression.

All individuals, female or male, are entitled to personal consideration as persons. All of these recommendations or submissions depend upon certain attributes on the individual, upon each of you. We all need to have autonomy and control over own sexual functioning and expression. We need to respect the rights of others as the same equalities we claim for ourselves.

I hope that each of us will know the personal meaning of sexuality when we experience our own psychic growth and ego enhancement with others. But we can do that only when we free ourselves from gender stereotypes or sexist expectations. We can reach the heights of our full humanity if we are responsible and accountable for our actions. At the same time I believe that we need to act today and nourish a sense of our responsibility to others. I would like to close this presentation by saying that all these recommendations require of us a degree of gender sensitivity.

Gender sensitivity is the ability to recognize gender issues and especially the ability to recognize women’s different perceptions and interest arising from their different social locations and different gender roles. I hope I have left you with some food for thought so that you can express yourselves but also by being accountable and responsible for your actions.

A paper presented during FAD’s First Student Congress November 20-21, 1998 held at the University of the East, Manila Organized by the Foundation for Adolescent Development, Inc.